Maybe it isn't the best way to explain it to the kids, but I told them that when we attended the Paschal Matins and Divine Liturgy last night, it was like we punched the devil in the face. He was whispering to me for the hour or so before I had to wake the kids up, that it would be better for everyone if I let them sleep; he made my eyes droop with fatigue; and when I woke the kids up, and M started crying (he who was most excited to be going to church in the middle of the night), the devil told me how much easier it would be not to bother going at all. But we loaded four kids, four pillows, four comforters and four Paschal baskets (!) into the van, and off we went. The stars were very bright in the black sky when we tumbled out of van at the church. And after the procession, as everyone started joyfully singing "Christ is risen" over and over again, and as we got into the wonderful songs of the Paschal Matins, I thought to myself, "Ha (punch, punch) - this is the one thing needful, and I wouldn't trade any of us being here for anything."
Sunday, May 5, 2013
Sunday, April 7, 2013
April 7
Yesterday was my brother T's birthday. Unfortunately, we didn't get to hear his happy voice, in spite of multiple phone call, text message and skype attempts. We did skype with him last week on my brother A's birthday, however, and with A too. It is a month full of celebrations! Dad's birthday is next week. D's namesday is today, and D's godfather's birthday is tomorrow.
Yesterday, when told that today is D's namesday, P asked me if he could wrap a present for D. I said it didn't really matter, because a namesday is not about presents. But he insisted, so he took one of D's books and wrapped it up for him! At least the present will be familiar!
Read the lives of Saint Panteleimon and Saint Blandina to M and P last night, after L and D had gone to bed. Talked to the boys about strength of character and spirit, and how that kind of strength only comes from Christ and is so much more important than physical strength. Talked about persecution and how we are blessed at this time to live in a country reasonably free of persecution. A few families at our church are refugees from Africa and we talked about the persecution they faced, that led them to flee to Canada.
It is so easy to see our lives as the common reality. We forget about people in other parts of the world who literally struggle for life every day. We forget about our Christian heritage, and the saints that literally struggled for Christ and His Church every day. Much more was required of them than is asked of me at this point, and I pray to God for mercy. The beautiful prayer of St. Ephraim the Syrian really calms me:
O Lord and Master of my life, give me not a spirit of idleness, despondency, ambition or vain talking;
But rather a spirit of purity, humility, patience and love bestow upon me Thy servant.
Yea, O Lord and King, grant me to see my own faults and not to judge my brother,
for blessed art Thou unto ages of ages. Amen.
Yesterday, when told that today is D's namesday, P asked me if he could wrap a present for D. I said it didn't really matter, because a namesday is not about presents. But he insisted, so he took one of D's books and wrapped it up for him! At least the present will be familiar!
Read the lives of Saint Panteleimon and Saint Blandina to M and P last night, after L and D had gone to bed. Talked to the boys about strength of character and spirit, and how that kind of strength only comes from Christ and is so much more important than physical strength. Talked about persecution and how we are blessed at this time to live in a country reasonably free of persecution. A few families at our church are refugees from Africa and we talked about the persecution they faced, that led them to flee to Canada.
It is so easy to see our lives as the common reality. We forget about people in other parts of the world who literally struggle for life every day. We forget about our Christian heritage, and the saints that literally struggled for Christ and His Church every day. Much more was required of them than is asked of me at this point, and I pray to God for mercy. The beautiful prayer of St. Ephraim the Syrian really calms me:
O Lord and Master of my life, give me not a spirit of idleness, despondency, ambition or vain talking;
But rather a spirit of purity, humility, patience and love bestow upon me Thy servant.
Yea, O Lord and King, grant me to see my own faults and not to judge my brother,
for blessed art Thou unto ages of ages. Amen.
Wednesday, April 3, 2013
April 3
While getting our fresh air this afternoon, the kids and I found GRASS! An actual spot in the backyard where the snow melted completely into a puddle, through which we could see muddy, old, half-dead grass. The children got very excited, as this surely was a sign that spring is here!
It is hard to believe how quickly the snow is melting. I thought it would take months, but in only a few days the level in the backyard has gone down by about ten inches. Crazy. It's not even that warm, although the kids traded in winter coats for light jackets today. We have a huge puddle at the end of the driveway and part way down the sidewalk. The ice and snow in the road are still too high to let the water drain away. As we drove into the driveway this evening, M said, "Entering the lake!"
The kids have the week off of school. This afternoon I took them to a musical show at the mall, based on Richard Scarry's Busytown books. It was well done and they enjoyed it. Got smoothies from Mc D's afterwards.
A and I are going to Pre-Sanctified Liturgy tonight. D is getting better with the babysitter, although he still grabs my leg and wants to be held as soon as she comes in the door; when he sees her, he knows it means I'm going out!
Enjoyed the visit with M and J last week. The kids had a blast with J, and he quite enjoyed watching and listening to them. I took them to the airport, feeling like we had had a nice visit and that it had been long enough, and then cried half the way home. Only because I feel like I have not got any true, close friends here yet. And saying goodbye to M and J, I re-lived the leave-taking of other dear friends, who I miss so much on a daily basis. As I did once before (with an amazing result), I prayed to God to provide a friend for me - the one I need, hopefully Orthodox, who I can "click" with, trust, share pain and growth and faith. I have found that this type of friend is a rarity - literally, a needle in a haystack. Not that I am ungrateful for those people I have met and loved here and before here.
It is hard to believe how quickly the snow is melting. I thought it would take months, but in only a few days the level in the backyard has gone down by about ten inches. Crazy. It's not even that warm, although the kids traded in winter coats for light jackets today. We have a huge puddle at the end of the driveway and part way down the sidewalk. The ice and snow in the road are still too high to let the water drain away. As we drove into the driveway this evening, M said, "Entering the lake!"
The kids have the week off of school. This afternoon I took them to a musical show at the mall, based on Richard Scarry's Busytown books. It was well done and they enjoyed it. Got smoothies from Mc D's afterwards.
A and I are going to Pre-Sanctified Liturgy tonight. D is getting better with the babysitter, although he still grabs my leg and wants to be held as soon as she comes in the door; when he sees her, he knows it means I'm going out!
Enjoyed the visit with M and J last week. The kids had a blast with J, and he quite enjoyed watching and listening to them. I took them to the airport, feeling like we had had a nice visit and that it had been long enough, and then cried half the way home. Only because I feel like I have not got any true, close friends here yet. And saying goodbye to M and J, I re-lived the leave-taking of other dear friends, who I miss so much on a daily basis. As I did once before (with an amazing result), I prayed to God to provide a friend for me - the one I need, hopefully Orthodox, who I can "click" with, trust, share pain and growth and faith. I have found that this type of friend is a rarity - literally, a needle in a haystack. Not that I am ungrateful for those people I have met and loved here and before here.
Friday, March 22, 2013
still indoors
They are saying that this is a winter that we will talk about for years, that we will tell our children and grandchildren about. Really. The most snow on record ever. The coldest winter on record ever. The most days the highways have been closed or had warnings ever. The most days bus service has been canceled ever. The list goes on. And so does winter . . .
The kids had no school today. The teachers got the day off to make up for parent/teacher interviews. I finally got around to drawing the frames on the wall of the boys' bedroom, and they spent a good hour painting their masterpieces! Looks pretty cool! Original art is definitely priceless!
They spent the afternoon making and playing in a fort/tent in the living room, and we roasted marshmallows over the gas stove and made popcorn. We played cards and read stories. I went outside for 30 minutes with the dog and shoveled the snow away from the foundation (again) in between the ball throws. Somehow when I was out there, D got a bruise and hurt his foot. Not sure what happened, as he can't tell me quite yet. He seems okay.
P fell off the chair at supper time and hurt his arm. I thought for a second that it had got broken, as it was twisted a funny way, caught between the chair and the railing, but he just has a scrape and what will become a very colorful bruise.
A is going tomorrow with Dad to S to get his new van. He has been using my van since the mishap and I can't wait to have it back! The highways out of town have been closed for two days; some foolish people have decided to chance it anyway and have gotten stuck where even emergency vehicles can't get through, because of blowing snow and piling snowdrifts. Most that have ventured out onto closed roads have been rescued and driven home, but have had to leave their vehicles behind. Over the next couple of days things are supposed to get better. I hope so, as I have to go to R on Monday afternoon to pick up M and J, who were supposed to fly in on Thursday (the worst winter day of the year, apparently). They went as far as C (where conditions were not much better - I heard there was a 100 car pile-up on the highway between C and E, and cars in the ditch all along the way) and barely made it to E. Anyway, I hope they get here okay, as I am really looking forward to the visit.
Still working on my photo scrapbooks. Love Mixbook! Have got 5 completed, but still have a lot more to do. They are so beautiful! The quality is amazing! I have to wait to order the most recent two till they put out another coupon, as I cannot afford to buy them at full price.
There is a model train show tomorrow at the Western Development Museum, and hopefully Mom will come with me and the kids. M goes to a birthday party in the afternoon.
So excited for Sunday of Orthodoxy! Love it! So grateful for icons and those who fought for us to be able to have them. Glory to God!
The kids had no school today. The teachers got the day off to make up for parent/teacher interviews. I finally got around to drawing the frames on the wall of the boys' bedroom, and they spent a good hour painting their masterpieces! Looks pretty cool! Original art is definitely priceless!
They spent the afternoon making and playing in a fort/tent in the living room, and we roasted marshmallows over the gas stove and made popcorn. We played cards and read stories. I went outside for 30 minutes with the dog and shoveled the snow away from the foundation (again) in between the ball throws. Somehow when I was out there, D got a bruise and hurt his foot. Not sure what happened, as he can't tell me quite yet. He seems okay.
P fell off the chair at supper time and hurt his arm. I thought for a second that it had got broken, as it was twisted a funny way, caught between the chair and the railing, but he just has a scrape and what will become a very colorful bruise.
A is going tomorrow with Dad to S to get his new van. He has been using my van since the mishap and I can't wait to have it back! The highways out of town have been closed for two days; some foolish people have decided to chance it anyway and have gotten stuck where even emergency vehicles can't get through, because of blowing snow and piling snowdrifts. Most that have ventured out onto closed roads have been rescued and driven home, but have had to leave their vehicles behind. Over the next couple of days things are supposed to get better. I hope so, as I have to go to R on Monday afternoon to pick up M and J, who were supposed to fly in on Thursday (the worst winter day of the year, apparently). They went as far as C (where conditions were not much better - I heard there was a 100 car pile-up on the highway between C and E, and cars in the ditch all along the way) and barely made it to E. Anyway, I hope they get here okay, as I am really looking forward to the visit.
Still working on my photo scrapbooks. Love Mixbook! Have got 5 completed, but still have a lot more to do. They are so beautiful! The quality is amazing! I have to wait to order the most recent two till they put out another coupon, as I cannot afford to buy them at full price.
There is a model train show tomorrow at the Western Development Museum, and hopefully Mom will come with me and the kids. M goes to a birthday party in the afternoon.
So excited for Sunday of Orthodoxy! Love it! So grateful for icons and those who fought for us to be able to have them. Glory to God!
Thursday, February 28, 2013
ice
Both of L's teachers were sick today, and so there were two substitute teachers in. Well, that didn't go over so well with nineteen 3-4 year olds! L actually did really well. I forgot she was Star of the Day, so she can take something for Show & Share tomorrow.
I was looking after K again today, as her mom is in Russia for a couple of weeks. I am amazed how nicely she and P played together all morning! They aren't that amiable at church!
Sold the wardrobe from downstairs - and got the antique one into the guest room. It looks so much better than that modern monstrosity! And it fits better too. A doesn't agree. Ha!
The kitchen came from Ikea, so A is taking tomorrow off work to set it up. Then I can get to decorating! I already have a canvas for the wall, and some cool dishes I found at the thrift store. I need to buy a rug for under the table and chairs, and a kettle and toaster. Maybe a set of cutlery. Good thing Zellers is closing soon - one can actually afford to buy new things at their discount prices!
M and I broke up some of the ice on the driveway this afternoon. It was quite therapeutic! It takes muscle, and pounding into something is a great tension release! There was about 3" of ice under the dusting of snow. Anyway, most of it is done now, and I guess the sun will work on the rest. Spring is definitely on the way! We were out with no coats again today. It is great!
I was looking after K again today, as her mom is in Russia for a couple of weeks. I am amazed how nicely she and P played together all morning! They aren't that amiable at church!
Sold the wardrobe from downstairs - and got the antique one into the guest room. It looks so much better than that modern monstrosity! And it fits better too. A doesn't agree. Ha!
The kitchen came from Ikea, so A is taking tomorrow off work to set it up. Then I can get to decorating! I already have a canvas for the wall, and some cool dishes I found at the thrift store. I need to buy a rug for under the table and chairs, and a kettle and toaster. Maybe a set of cutlery. Good thing Zellers is closing soon - one can actually afford to buy new things at their discount prices!
M and I broke up some of the ice on the driveway this afternoon. It was quite therapeutic! It takes muscle, and pounding into something is a great tension release! There was about 3" of ice under the dusting of snow. Anyway, most of it is done now, and I guess the sun will work on the rest. Spring is definitely on the way! We were out with no coats again today. It is great!
peace
Last night, M had a soccer game and they WON! I was so disappointed to miss it, but Mom and A were away and the babysitter was busy, so Dad had to take him and I stayed home with the others. It really doesn't work to take the young ones to the indoor field, as there is nothing for them to do, and D likes to run onto the field and steal the cones or soccer ball! Anyway, there will be more games, I'm sure.
A guy from World Vision came to the door yesterday, doing door to door recruitment for sponsors. Well, I am a total suck when it comes to that! All he had to do was show me a few pictures of "desperate" kids, and I was signing the dotted line. I justified it by thinking "one kid sponsored for each of my children", as we already sponsor three. Reading about the life of the boy I chose, I felt like weeping at the excesses in our house. The boys and I talked about him before they went to sleep and, again, P almost cried wishing for an "Orthodox world". He asked me, "Mom, will heaven be an Orthodox world?" I said that it would be, but even better.
I started thinking about peace. I can't say that I wish for world peace, because world peace would mean that right and wrong had been abolished, that everything had become acceptable, that everything had become permissible, that morality had disappeared, that all were normal, that none were normal. I suppose this will happen under the influence of the antichrist. And of course, it will be beautiful and hopeful - and we will be lulled into a false sense of serenity. How scary!
Come quickly, Lord Jesus! [Revelation 22:20]
A guy from World Vision came to the door yesterday, doing door to door recruitment for sponsors. Well, I am a total suck when it comes to that! All he had to do was show me a few pictures of "desperate" kids, and I was signing the dotted line. I justified it by thinking "one kid sponsored for each of my children", as we already sponsor three. Reading about the life of the boy I chose, I felt like weeping at the excesses in our house. The boys and I talked about him before they went to sleep and, again, P almost cried wishing for an "Orthodox world". He asked me, "Mom, will heaven be an Orthodox world?" I said that it would be, but even better.
I started thinking about peace. I can't say that I wish for world peace, because world peace would mean that right and wrong had been abolished, that everything had become acceptable, that everything had become permissible, that morality had disappeared, that all were normal, that none were normal. I suppose this will happen under the influence of the antichrist. And of course, it will be beautiful and hopeful - and we will be lulled into a false sense of serenity. How scary!
Come quickly, Lord Jesus! [Revelation 22:20]
sustained
"Cast your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you." Psalm 55:22
Sustain: to support, hold, or bear up to keep a person from giving way.
I have been and continue to be sustained. I feel like a deflated balloon a lot of the time, and try to remember daily to "give it to the Lord", as my Grandma used to say. And, it seems to help. Although some days . . . well, there are a LOT of cares!
Faith cultivates trust, and trust cultivates patience. And, when I try to be patient, with prayer for the increase of trust and faith, God acts. To change me. To change someone else. To calm and diffuse a tricky situation. And I am thankful for this.
Sustain: to support, hold, or bear up to keep a person from giving way.
I have been and continue to be sustained. I feel like a deflated balloon a lot of the time, and try to remember daily to "give it to the Lord", as my Grandma used to say. And, it seems to help. Although some days . . . well, there are a LOT of cares!
Faith cultivates trust, and trust cultivates patience. And, when I try to be patient, with prayer for the increase of trust and faith, God acts. To change me. To change someone else. To calm and diffuse a tricky situation. And I am thankful for this.
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